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At the end of my last entry, I mentioned my first girlfriend whose identity I’ll protect by using only her initials- K.Y. I was 13 and she was 12. I’m dark-skinned and she was very light and slim. I thank God that some men have a code of honor because by then, there were 5 men in the neighborhood who got their dicks sucked by me and they could’ve blown up my spot- but they didn’t.14ec3ed449a08945457a1cb2b2445d4eIf I packed bags at a local supermarket, had an early-morning paper route that I ran on bike, excelled in school and went to church every Sunday. In a small town, my life would’ve went differently, I’d be married with children and probably bored close to death.                                                     K.Y. never learned that I’d been with men and I can’t lie, I still collected porn secretly and still noticed bulges in so many Black men’s pants, shorts or sweatpants and still fantasized/reminisced. However, I loved my girlfriend and swore she loved me so I was loyal. We went to movies, roller-skating, amusement parks, had lunch and dinner dates and I could afford inexpensive gifts sometimes. We kissed, touched, sucked (my oral skills blew her mind) and fucked but I was about to learn a lesson that all young men in the ‘hood learn eventually. There are some men who have absolutely no respect for relationships and have designs on young girls and women that have nothing to do with love.  There was a pimp in our neighborhood who went by the name of Ice Cream (these dudes are always well-dressed, have colorful names and ‘ghetto-rich). They’re always smooth-talkers and I imagine well-hung. One day, I noticed K.Y. getting out of Ice Cream’s car. They looked a little too friendly and I noticed she was wearing a new gold necklace. I went right over, snatched the chain off her neck and threw it through his open driver’s-side window. I had an older cousin who lived up the block and went to go talk to him. K.Y. was crying that she didn’t do anything, running behind me. I yelled at her: “Go home- I’m not mad at you- just go home!” I told my cousin what happened and he was ready to go do something but I pleaded with him that I had to handle it or nobody would respect me. I wanted to borrow his pistol and that argument went on for a little while before he let me hold it. He made me promise not to use it- just show it to him and say what I had to say.This motherfucker was still parked on my block and I went to the passenger side and got in. I said: “That little girl is only 12 years old- we don’t call the cops and I’m not gonna tell her mom”. I showed him the gun and pointed it at his stomach. I said: “Stay the fuck away from her and her younger sisters”. He already knew to stay away from the girls in my family because my dad was a war veteran. He also wasn’t gonna put his hands on me because my dad, uncles and older cousins would’ve buried him. He did say: “She only did the same thing you did”. I busted him in his mouth with the butt of the gun and got out the car. I looked back to see him grinning, already wiping his bloody mouth.tumblr_n8j8z6ilhK1sz6efao1_540 (1)I went to her house to go see her and she had the nerve to be upset that I took the chain. She was crying then and saying how sorry she was and I held her but I couldn’t say anything. I kept fuckin’ with her (because pussy is pussy) but it wasn’t love anymore. She lived right across the street- my family knew what happened but her family didn’t. Gentlemen try to protect a woman’s reputation. This incident didn’t make me bitter towards women. I couldn’t get too upset- I had sucked dick for free.What did happen is that once I started high school that September (a 13-year old freshman), I started sucking dick again- but never in that neighborhood again. When it started happening again, it was totallyblack-bunny121212

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